How many times in a day or week do you find yourself saying, “I really should have…” or “I wish I could have…” or “If only I would have…”? Many of us say these lines without a second thought.
But, what value do they hold for us? When are these statements most helpful? Most of the time they feed our sense of guilt, shame, blame or regret. Rarely are they productive, unless used as a sincere reflection that’s genuinely positive or profitable for the future.
Lately I’ve found myself saying my own shoulda, woulda, couldas…surrounding my recent water skiing accident and eight weeks of therapy that haven’t brought about the healing I had anticipated. On top of that, we recently discovered through another set of x-rays and doctor visits that I was misdiagnosed originally…instead of torn muscles alone, we now know that I have two fractures that need the attention of an orthopedic specialist and a new regiment of therapy.
I’m left with a spiritual, emotional and physical dilemma… continually look back with regret, shame, blame and guilt? Or, look forward with lessons learned and a newly transformed prognosis for healing?
Shame, blame, guilt and regret are not good for the soul…I’m going to choose patience, joy, and a faith-filled anticipation of brighter days ahead.
What will you do with your “shoulda, woulda, couldas” this coming week?