The Only Legitimate Selfishness


The Only Legitimate Selfishness

The only place in life where it’s legitimate to be selfish is in the care and nurture of your soul. Without which, you will never fully learn what it means to be selfless in the care of another.”

This was the summary voiced by my wise spiritual director many years ago, when we were discussing the importance of a daily walk with God amidst a full, active, and noisy ministry life.

Saying no to internal and external demands is hard to do. We generally like to be needed, helpful, active, and productive. We need to learn how to say no to every other tap on our shoulder beckoning for our attention, in order to focus exclusively on being in the presence of God alone.

When we say no to all other voices, in order to say yes to the voice of God, we develop a spacious attentiveness that sweetens, deepens, and ripens over time. Once this kind of focused intentionality is gained, the expression of love from God is rich and abundant. The fruit of such intimacy is a delight to behold.

Today, can you legitimize some selfishness of soul in order to listen attentively to the still, small voice of God? Sit with God in His Word, listen intently for his voice in your prayers, and reflect humbly on your brokenness and on how he desires to heal and redeem it all for his glory.

Resting in his enveloping love will ensure your preparation to selflessly love another in Jesus’ name. Watch how it happens and rejoice!


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Steve Macchia

Founder & President

Steve is a graduate of Northwestern College (IA) and Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary (M.Div. and D.Min.). His prior ministry includes serving on the pastoral staff at Grace Chapel (Lexington, MA) and as president of Vision New England. Since July 1, 2003 Steve has served as founder and president of Leadership Transformations, director of the Pierce Center for Disciple-Building, and adjunct faculty in the Doctor of Ministry department at Gordon-Conwell. He is the author of sixteen books, including The Discerning Life (Zondervan Reflective),  Baker bestseller Becoming a Healthy Church, and Crafting a Rule of Life (IVP). He lives in the Boston area with his wife Ruth and is the proud father of two grown children, Rebekah and Nathan, daughter in-love Ashley, and papa to his beloved granddaughter, Brenna Lynn and twin grandsons, Aiden Joseph and Carson Stephen. “My soul comes alive singing the great hymns of the church and enjoying the beauty of God’s creation. I’m in awe of God for fulfilling the dream for LTI that he birthed in my heart, for the team he has assembled, and the transformational impact experienced in the leaders and teams we serve.

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