A Wise Friend

My spiritual director equates a personal rule of life to a “wise friend” – similar to the relationship we have with someone who has wisdom, strength, courage, conviction, tenderness, compassion, and love. Likened to a person with whom we entrust our lives, having productive conversations, whether easy or challenging, so too will a rule of life always bring about abundance from within.

A wise friend…are you that to another? Do you have such a friend yourself? When I consider my own life, I feel very fortunate to look back and around me, able to list several wise friends who were there for me when I needed them the most. Rich, who wisely led me into salvation. Warren, who wisely welcomed me into ministry. David, who wisely instructed me to pray. Bob, who wisely challenged me in my leadership. Caleb, who wisely came alongside me during a difficult decision. Paul, who wisely chastised me when I chose cynicism rather than forgiveness. Brad, who wisely counseled me to be a more sensitive husband and loving father.

I am forever grateful for my wise friends. They have been like rudders under my ship, steering me away from treacherous shoals, guiding me during turbulent seasons, and sustaining me during calm waters. Their wisdom has been my strength. Their wisdom has been to my benefit. Their wisdom has been pure gift to my soul.

So now I hope I’m able to offer the wisdom of years and experience to those who cross my path. I want to be a wise friend rather than a foolish one. A fool leads others astray, encourages the false self, and looks the other way when another is about to fall. A fool has no grounding, no backbone, and no firm foundation. A fool is unwilling to speak truth in love, doesn’t know the power of forgiveness and grace. A fool is not a friend at all.

We need wise friends. We are called to be wise friends. Our rule of life is like a wise friend, and sustains us in our desire to be a wise friend to another. Keep the conversation alive both with God, your Fount of Wisdom, and with others who come alongside you as your friends. Join the journey with others at www.ruleoflife.com and watch how mentors and wise friends are encouraging the abundant life.

“He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm” Proverbs 13:20.


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Steve Macchia

Founder & President

The Rev. Dr. Stephen A. Macchia is founder and president of Leadership Transformations, Inc. (LTI), a ministry serving the spiritual formation, discernment, and renewal of leaders and learners since 2003. For more than 20 years he has been the Director of the Pierce Center for Disciple-Building at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary, where he also serves as an adjunct faculty member in the Doctor of Ministry Program. From 1989-2003 he was the president of Vision New England, the largest regional church renewal association in the country. Earlier in his ministry life, Steve was a member of the pastoral staff of Grace Chapel in Lexington, Massachusetts for 11 years. He is the author or co-author of 17 books, including The Discerning Life (Zondervan Reflective), and Crafting a Rule of Life, Becoming A Healthy Church (LTI), and Broken and Whole (IVP).  He and his wife Ruth live in the Boston (MA) area and are the proud parents of two married children and grandparents to three adorable grandchildren. Steve’s personal website is www.SteveMacchia.com.

My soul comes alive singing the great hymns of the church and enjoying the beauty of God’s creation. I’m in awe of God for fulfilling the dream for LTI that he birthed in my heart, for the team he has assembled, and the transformational impact experienced in the leaders and teams we serve.

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Mitzi Mak

Selah-West Faculty

Mitzi started her professional life as a high school social studies teacher. She and her husband Jerry then served cross-culturally for ten+ years, living abroad first in India and then Kurdistan, N. Iraq. In addition to being a Spiritual Director, she now serves as a Formation and Care pastor in her local church in Houston, TX. She has graduated from LTI’s Selah Spiritual Direction training as well as LTI’s Emmaus Formational Leadership Program.

Mitzi enjoys engaging conversation, reading fiction, doing jigsaw/crossword puzzles, ocean gazing and exploring the world with Jerry through food and travel.

God has two main callings in Mitzi’s life: to care for those who care for others and to be a guide in helping others have a healthy relationship with the Trinity – recognizing God’s loving presence and activity in their lives and how to faithfully respond.

Selah was a transformative experience for me – allowing the contemplative within to emerge and to beautifully co-exist with my extraverted personality.